The Women’s Dressing Room is a Battlefield

I have been struggling with my body image more lately than ever before and I thought maybe if I made more of an effort to work on my appearance it might help me feel better about the way I look. That is why this weekend I went to one of my favorite department stores with the quest to buy a new dress for a future date night with officer P. 

As soon as I walked in the door I saw this adorable dress and grabbed it up right away!

After walking around for a bit I decided to head to the dressing room to try it on and with visions of how it “should look” in my head I felt my heart sink a little. It didn’t fit right. The waist was not falling at my waist and was too tight. The fabric got staticky as I put it on so it clung weird as well. My legs and knees looked thick, I just looked horrible in it. This bad fitting quickly turned my excited mood into one of dread.

As I came out of the dressing room with my emotions written all over my face I waited for my sister to try on a shirt she had picked up. As I waited I saw a teenage girl come out of a dressing room with a stack of shorts and only handed her mom 1 pair. She had, what appeared to be, her whole family with her and as her mom questioned her as to why she was only getting the 1 pair she replied “because they are the only ones that look okay on me.” As her dad and sister chime in with suggestions and insisting that she try on more she started pleading with tears in her eyes that they just leave her alone and take her home, which they finally agreed to.

This left me sad and I had to fight back some tears myself. I felt bad for the girl who was probably close to 20 years younger then me, and certainly had a thinner body than mine, but appeared to be feeling the exact same way I was. I was sad that this is something that almost every women goes through over and over again throughout their lives and that we have learned to hate our bodies for what they are not, instead of loving them for all that they are. 

Since I was determined to buy a dress I went on a hunt for some more dresses to try on. After more wandering around I headed to another dressing room, since that first one was now tainted with bad juju, to try on some more dresses.

                      

Sadly it was two more misses and I decided I needed a break so I headed over to housewares to look around for something for the new house.

After going up and down every aisle in housewares I found myself back in the clothing department. I decided to give it one more shot, and once again I headed into the dressing room with a couple of dresses in hand.

                

Sadly, once again I struck out. I decided 3 strikes (and 2+ hours) and I was out so I went home with these beauties instead.

Since I was unsuccessful in my mission I know I will have to head back to battle soon, but for now I am enjoying my shoes and trying to better prepare myself for round 2.

Have you ever had an unpleasant dressing room experience? How did you get over it and get back in there?

Random Updates Galore!

I know, I know I have been gone forever!! Life has been crazy here in Pixie land!

First of all I am finally in Houston!! and in my new house too!! The kids are back in public school, and officer P is home and today he starts back at his permanent duty location so things are finally settling down.

I told you. Lots going on!

Even though I had been keeping on eye on the weather I was surprised with quite a bit of snow on our road trip from California to Texas!! I wasn’t prepare for it, and it was the first time I have ever driven in that much snow, but it was so much easier to manage then the sand storms in west Texas!!

Thankfully we made it safe and sound and the kids were so happy to be back “home”!!

About a week and a half after we arrived in Houston all the papers were signed and I was handed an envelope full of keys to our new house!!

Since then I have been busy unpacking, getting the girls settled in at school, and planning how I’m going to make the new house our “home”. This means a lot of time on Pinterest (do you follow me) pinning ideas.

Honestly, I really love it. At one point I had wanted to be an interior designer, then I realized I’m not that creative and can only copy other people’s ideas so I scratched that idea.

It’s going to take a very long time for me to get everything just how I want it, but I have already started my list of everything I need to make/ get and will be working through it little by little.

My first project was to turn these chairs and stained up cushions

         

into this!! 

I painted the table to match and now I’m trying to commit to a centerpiece idea. I’ll keep you posted on that. ;)

As for running, I’ve finally started to do that again. The new neighborhood is great for running, complete with sidewalks and nature trails, so I’m really looking forward to getting into a routine again! 

So there you have it. What I’ve been up to in a nutshell!!

Intuitive Eating: What it is & Why I’m Doing It.

I first heard of intuitive eating as a “thing” on a twitter chat a couple of months ago. It sounded interesting, but I didn’t really think any more about it until just before the Princess Half when I started researching it online. I then ended up buying the book “Intuitive Eating: A Revolutionary Program That Works” on my iPad to keep me busy on my flight back from Disney. I read through about a third of the book on my flight and have been slowly working through the rest as I can.

Simply put, diets do not work for me in the long run. Over the years I have tried a few and they all had the same thing in common, either they had long lists food restrictions, or in some cases the diet is so restrictive that they give a list of foods you are allowed to eat instead since that list is much smaller, or they require you to “count” your food.

Whether it be points, macronutrient ratios, or calories I absolutely hate counting my food. I see how keeping a food log can help one realize just how much they have or  haven’t ate, but what happens when you have eaten your allotted calories for the day and are legitimately still hungry? Here is where intuitive eating just makes more since to me. 

Much like it sounds, intuitive eating is all about learning to trust your body to tell you what, when, and how much to eat. It sounds simple enough, but unlike all the diets out there you can’t just print out a shopping list and be on your way. Instead there is a lengthy road ahead of you as you work through the 10 principles of intuitive eating.

Principle 1 is to reject the diet mentality. For many, years of dieting and watching everything that they eat has been ingrained into their brains so this principle can be a huge first step to breaking free from their serial dieting.

I haven’t been a huge dieter, although I have always “watched what I ate” for as long as I can remember. Kicking the diet mentality has gone pretty well for me, but I do find myself trying to revert back to some dieting “tricks” I picked up along the way every once in awhile. On the bright side I am more aware of them now so they are not as much of a habit as they use to be, and I realize what I am doing.

Principle 2, honoring your hunger, is where I am currently at. I feel I will probably be stuck here for quite awhile. After suffering from an eating disorder in my younger teen years, being hungry doesn’t bother me all that much so I have to relearn my hunger cues. Not only do I need to learn what my cues are, but then I also need to honor them. I am notorious for not knowing what I want to eat, which is usually more of a battle between what I really want to eat and what I feel I *should* eat, which leads to me delaying my meal until I am starving and then I eat anything and everything I can get in my mouth fast enough to try and catch up to my hunger.

Yes, we can all see the flaw in this method, yet I do it over and over again and I really seem to be surprised each time it happens.   

I will be covering the other 8 principle in future posts, as I am working on them myself, but a few things you should know, and keep in mind, about intuitive eating is that it is not so much a weight loss program as it is a listening to your body thing. Also your body has a natural weight, which probably will not be the weight you want it to be, so you have to dump the scale and trust how you feel.

Through observations over the years I know that my body likes to hang around 145 lbs. That is a weight I can usually maintain easily and the weight my body tends to naturally fall back into time after time. For my 5’4” body that put me on the high end of normal, according to all the BMI charts, but about 10-15 pounds over what they feel my “ideal” weight is. I fully expect, that through intuitive eating, I will find myself right back at that weight but I am hoping to switch some of my fat weight over to muscle weight through exercise and weight training.    

Have you ever heard of or done intuitive eating before? What other “diets” or “lifestyle changes” have you tried in the past?